On affection, friendship, love and hate - EXPeditions

On affection, friendship, love and hate

by Adam Phillips
  • Key point 1
    One of the things about the initial affectionate relationship is that there’s mutual accommodation, that people are attuned to what the other wants and lives and is frightened of.
  • Key point 2
    Once you exploit someone’s affection, you effectively exploit their innocence, you rob them of their innocence. Innocence means fundamental trust, unsuspicious trust.
  • Key point 3
    Friendship is a very important period in a child’s life, when they begin to realise that there might be real pleasures outside the family circle.
  • Key point 4
    It’s misleading to think we either hate each other or we love each other. Wherever there’s love, there’s hate. Wherever there’s hate, there’s love.